Relationships give meaning to our lives. Having the support of a romantic partner, friend or family member makes us feel wanted. It gives us inspiration and love in what could otherwise be a very cold world.
So, when there’s a rift with someone close to us, it can feel like a mini death. Losing the trust of our loved ones can bring along frustration, stress, and confusion. Unfortunately, we aren’t taught the skills to heal broken relationships in an empowering way.
Enter the Ho’oponopono!
Ho’opo…what?
Ho’oponopono means “to make right” in the Hawaiian language and is an ancient Hawaiian forgiveness process for creating new connections and rejuvenating relationships. It consists of a simple mantra:
I Love You,
I’m Sorry,
Please Forgive Me,
Thank You
Recite this mantra as you focus your mental energy on the disagreement and the other person. Doing so will help clear negative emotions and energy left over from the rift. It’s a way of pushing the reset button in the relationship.Wait…that sounds like woo woo magic – you might say.
Well, there’s scientific research proving the effectiveness of the Ho’oponopono. Studies show that using the Ho’oponopono promotes healing and forgiveness. And the beautiful part is it doesn’t have to be performed face to face.
You can apply it on your own while recollecting the negative emotions from the broken relationship. This can allow you to heal the hurt inside yourself and move forward in the relationship.
And, to top things off, you can use it on yourself. This enables you to practice self-forgiveness and let go of your internal self-judgments.
The Process For Healing Relationships
So how do you actually apply the Ho’oponopono to your damaged relationships? Here are four steps to get the most out of this practice (courtesy of this article from changeyourenergy.com ):
- First, meditate on the feeling you wish to have when the matter is resolved. Whether that be peace, clarity, love, forgiveness, or mutual separation.
- Now that you’re clear on the end goal, reference the situation in your mind and recount how you and the other party got to the place you are now. What was said, done or felt that created the rift?
- Consciously release all that got you here and begin chanting the ho’oponopono mantra, aloud or in your head. Say it with intention, with gusto and with belief that it will heal you.
- Repeat it as many times as you feel necessary over the course of a week. Recommended is at least 10 intentional times a day, envisioning your end goal (from #1) in your mind the entire time. After this time, reevaluate your emotional state (and the emotional state of the other party–if you’ve included them or not) and gauge the progress you’ve made.
With Ho’oponopono, you no longer have to live with guilt and regret. It only takes a few minutes to start healing relationships in your life. And, after a few days, you should feel a sense of relief and peace, and readiness to move forward. For more details on practicing the Ho’oponopono, read the full article referenced above (2-minute read).
