Ending a relationship is never an easy task. It can be hard to know when the time is right and even harder to do it with love.
Sometimes, it’s the best thing for both parties involved. So how do you decide when to end a relationship?
When To End A Relationship
Though it’s painful to admit, there are clear signs that suggest it’s time to bring things to an end.
Your relationship is toxic.
A toxic relationship is one in which the bad outweighs the good. They leave you feeling down more often than not due to mistreatments such as abuse or infidelity. Toxic relationships can also form when your partner is emotionally unstable or unavailable.
You don’t communicate well.
Communication is at the heart of a healthy relationship. Do your interactions involve unhealthy habits like yelling, lying, or stonewalling? These are red flags that signal it may be time to walk away.
You fell out of love.
It’s only natural for people to evolve over time. Sometimes you grow apart. Other times, you meet someone new and develop unexpected feelings. Rather than string your partner along, it’s best to accept the truth about when to end a relationship.
In many cases, you’ll know that the relationship no longer serves you. But why do some people continue to hang on?
Why It’s Hard To Walk Away
As you decide when to end a relationship, you may experience difficulty letting go.
Many people hold on to relationships long after they’re over because they:
- Are used to being treated poorly.
- Fear the idea of being alone.
- Have low-self esteem.
- Don’t believe they’ll ever find love again.
Ultimately, if the relationship isn’t healthy or if it’s not making you happy, then it’s time to let go. Personal growth isn’t possible if you’re held back by fear and complacency.
How To End a Relationship Gracefully
Once you decide when to end a relationship, you have to plan out how you’ll break the news. But it’s essential to do it with compassion and understanding. Here are three simple steps to help you bring your relationship to a peaceful end.
Make your feelings known.
It can be traumatic for the other person when a breakup comes out of the blue. So be sure to let your partner know that you’re unhappy before officially severing ties.
You may also need to process your own feelings of sadness as you prepare to break up. It’s natural to experience a sense of loss when a relationship comes to a close. But remember that you will both find happiness again in the long run.
Be straightforward and explain your thinking.
You may be tempted to make up an excuse for ending things to ease the pain. Instead, be honest with the other person about what led to your decision and offer an explanation.
Studies show that understanding the reason for the breakup reduces internalized negative feelings.
Brace yourself for any feelings or questions the other person may have for you. If they become angry or upset, do your best to stay calm.
Make the break clean and amicable.
It may be tempting to withdraw entirely or initiate the breakup over text. However, research suggests that talking openly and in person is one of the best ways to soften the blow.
Let friends and family know what’s going on ahead of time so they can support you. However, don’t disparage your ex or engage in gossip, as this only makes the breakup more difficult.
Make a plan for exchanging possessions and decide what to do about social media. Exes don’t adjust to being friends overnight, so it’s okay to unfollow and unfriend each other at first.
After the breakup is over, be mindful of the thoughts and feelings that come up. Don’t try to fight them or suppress them. Instead, acknowledge that what you’re going through is normal. Be kind to yourself and avoid placing guilt and blame on yourself.
Give yourself permission to feel sad. Process your feelings through healthy self-care strategies. For example, spend time engaging in joyful movement, meditation, and relaxation.
Remember that each relationship offers a chance for personal growth. Be thankful for the time you were able to spend together.